Archives For April 2014

We’re All Wrong

April 28, 2014 — Leave A Comment

“We don’t see things the way they are, we see things the way we are.” ~ The Talmud

When coaching leadership teams, one of the foundational agreements we make going into the work is “Everybody gets to be right…partially.” For any team to become fully empowered and effective, this agreement is essential, because it allows for the basic fact that nobody sees the complete picture of any situation or challenge facing the team, and that every person’s perspective includes some truth that the team needs to hear and integrate into its decision-making.

Beneath the clever verbiage, it’s really just a way of agreeing to be humble with each other…to not assume that you (and you alone) have all the answers and see everything perfectly, or that “they” (that is, whoever sees things differently) are utterly misguided and wrong (and possibly evil) and have nothing of value to teach you at all.

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“What really matters for success, character, happiness and life long achievements is a definite set of emotional skills – your EQ — not just purely cognitive abilities that are measured by conventional IQ tests.” ~ Daniel Goleman

Back when my generation (GenX) was just coming of age, many of the societal prophets of the day predicted that one of the key cultural changes we would champion (and even demand) would be the shift away from top-down, hierarchical models of leadership in favor of flatter, more egalitarian approaches to work and life, and even religion.

Boy, were they right. 🙂 Our generational battle cry could well be, “The king is dead! Long live the autonomous collective!”

(Get the reference?)

By the way, this is a surprisingly insightful conversation between two generations: Boomers and GenX…


We’ve made this shift over the past 50 years, and as we have, leaders (and leadership as a skill) has had to redefine itself. What made for a great leader in 1970 is not the same as it is today. One thing that’s become increasingly clear in this transformation is that emotional intelligence matters more than ever in leadership. In today’s leadership landscape, the best leaders have strong emotional intelligence skills. Those that don’t suffer, struggling to manage an ever-shifting emotional landscape they have trouble perceiving, much less engaging in any meaningful way.

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“There is no neutral ground in the universe; every square inch, every split second, is claimed by God and counter-claimed by Satan.” ~ C.S. Lewis

My Great King!
I will not be afraid.
I will not dance with shame,
for You are my Way.

A dark army assails me.
Daily they claw at my borders.
Nightly they seed my soul with fears.
Yet You are here,
the Tree of Life at the center of me,
and ten thousand angels stand guarding my path.
I shall not be shaken.
I shall not be denied.

Oh my Great Captain!
I hear You more than everything,
even the war;
therefore, I stand.

Great Deliverer!
Deliver me now.
I see a high noble country
beyond these hills
scorched by war.
It is my inheritance,
and I would stand on its fair soil
in peace before I die.

Train my hands for battle, then.
Make them calloused and sure with the sword.
Train my heart for surrender to You alone,
and through You, to Beauty, Joy, Love,
and all that is valiant and full of glory.
Marry my weakness to Your strength,
and make me True.

Like my brother David before me, I say,
“Give me this crown!”
Like Caleb, I cry out,
“Give me this mountain!”
Like Moses and Joshua, I call out to You, God,
“Bring me safely into my Promised Land,
and deliver it into my hands.”

Set my body free.
Set my strength free.
Set my love free.
Set my soul free.
Set my life free.

And together
let us ride the high places,
and sing,
and wake the world.

(by Michael Warden)